The Three B-s of Perfection

Women are amazing beings. They’re not only the channel of life, but also natural uplifters and strengtheners. As children, women have amazingly tender appearances, capable of melting an iceberg with their innocent smile. Little girls watch women and copy their gestures, ideals and motherly behavior. I’ve met amazing women in my life, and I can’t think of one who isn’t.

The most profound lesson I’ve learnt was from the closest woman in my world, my mother. She was “the three B-s” I’ve always silently admired: Bright, Brave, Beautiful. It took me twenty years to realize that I too was the three b - s and that all women, in their diversity, are all bright, brave and beautiful. No matter the age, culture, job, I have never seen one that didn’t possess at least one of these qualities.

My mother was Bright. She was a philosophy PhD and taught as a lecturer at university. Her students loved and respected her and she was always interested in their opinions. More than professionally, she was bright in life. When something didn’t work out, she would always focus on improving herself. Nothing is more rewarding for a woman than improving herself, becoming more of her very best and living the abundance of this smart attitude. She was always growing, always changing, feeling the joy of living. I’ve spent most of my life looking at her from a distorsioned perspective, like I could never ever be that bright, that brave, that beautiful.

Luckily, I realized that she had passed it all on to me and I still had the time to verbally thank her from the bottom of my heart for teaching me the greatest lesson of my life. She was a model, a super-woman, a positive force, a natural uplifter, not by word, but by living life to the full.

My mother was Brave. That brave that I have never seen her frightened, sad or complaining. At most, I’d catch her troubled, but she’d never reveal the reasons. She spoke at conferences, taught American philosophy, wrote books, lectured. She loved challenges and always responded positively in the interested of all involved. The last and the greatest challenge in her life was amazingly bravely accepted. There are no words to describe the braveness of her last nine months. Her look, her smile, her resistance were all expressions of the braves heart I’ve ever had the honor of knowing. I am living the privilege of being the child of the bravest.

My mother was Beautiful. Radiating from the inside, she warmed every lucky soul around her. Her smile and her big eyes revealed the beauty of a pure heart and endless supply of joy within. The beauty that comes from within cannot be described in words, for it is beyond anything physical.

A few weeks before her body stopped fighting, I went to see her in hospital in another town. I had left her so weak that she could barely speak. When I entered her room, I felt her scent (Obsession, by Calvin Klein) and it was wonderful. Then I saw her: sitting on the bed watching TV, more beautiful than words could ever say. She had a large T-shirt on, black tights and her big brown eyes were warm and peaceful. She was wearing red lipstick, black eye crayon, golden earrings and a big, happy smile. That’s when I started to understand what true beauty really is and it has absolutely nothing to do with anything physical. I only have the physical words to describe that beauty state and they are limiting.

I then understood perfectly that even though the physical may shade, that which is within will never die. The word death means nothing anymore and the way we interpret the physical’s fading is just that, an interpretation. There are cultures where death is celebrated. In our culture, we see death as the greatest possible tragedy. I almost laugh when I hear the classical condoleances or when someone says they feel sorry for me. I used to justify my permanent connection with my mother’s soul and tell people she didn’t really die for me. Now I just express gratitude for their intention and if they don’t renounce the “pitty party” I tell them it’s for the best because she had been in pain for too long. That’s the only language they understand and that seems logical to them.

What most people don’t know is that I haven’t really lost anything. My mother is more alive within my heart than ever before and her spirit is guiding my way like a guardian angel. This feeling is the only truth in my heart, no matter what I’ve been raised to believe.


There is a wisdom far greater than any culture, than any man. Call it God, Universe, Jesus, Spirit, it’s all the same. That wisdom invaded my heart that day and I found the absolute truth: there is so much more than the physical us. That much more is our soul, our higher self, our guidance.

The peace on my mother’s face that day expressed the absolute harmony of her being. I truly believe that she has found her peace, her balance. She will always be my mother, my model, my inspiration. But more than that, she is the Bright, Brave and Beautiful soul that showed me the way to my true Self.